Sunday, August 10, 2014

Birthday Month

I hadn't known that August was full of my friend's (and son's) birthdays, well not only August but the Autumn months in general. My best friend (literally) forever's  birthday is today and my son is turning three in two days. Time is passing too fast and this is one of those times I wish that life had a pause and rewind button.

I am glad that my friends are being super nice and getting my son a lot to celebrate his birthday this week. I'm not sure if we'll have a party, because I don't have money for anything to do with celebrations--I don't even have enough for gas. Maybe we ought to have a get together at the park? Well, if anything it'd be a last-minute invite, so there's that. I wish I could get presents for my friend and son, though. At least there are more people to help them celebrate than just me.

Regarding work: I work for myself and I'm required to provide proof that I do, otherwise the county will discontinue the benefits that I receive. The only thing that I'm concerned about is health insurance...I can't afford that cost and that part is making me nervous. I might have to ask around about private health insurance. The one thing that is troublesome about providing proof is that I don't know what else the county needs; I already turned in my RA forms and the last I remember about this whole ordeal is that was all I needed--but I had only encountered this "problem" before the car accident and my caseworker then was much more helpful than my caseworker now.

Other than that... I love my truck and I honestly do not want to get rid of it. I know that it's a gas-gussler and that makes it rough. I have been thinking of financing for a sedan but after doing all of the math, I won't be able to comfortably do that before another six or so months have passed. If I traded it in or sold it privately, buying a new(er) sedan would be only slightly easier but even then I would still have a hard time affording things. As I added it all up: I don't have a car payment on my truck, affording the gas itself is practically a car payment, car insurance for me right now is insane and besides that my truck still requires routine maintenance. But, regarding a new(er) sedan: I would have a car payment (which would be pretty high because my CS sucks), gas would be slightly cheaper than with my truck but still expensive, my car insurance would increase because it's a "newer" vehicle and the car would require routine maintenance. So, it sadly makes better sense for me to keep my truck, save money, build my credit and power through these financial difficulties for a few months. If I had the sense when I bought my truck (or someone had taken my settlement and helped me use it responsibly), I (probably) would have bought a (brand new) sedan and still had money left over even now. But, as it is: I struggle and fight through things, which is life.

Eventually, things will get easier, I just have to work through this tough time.